Hot Oil Treatments

 For years, I've been doing hot oil treatments, mostly via pre-poo. They used to work a little, but then I didn't notice a difference. A couple of years ago, I decided to stop altogether because I was just wasting oils and time. I started to think my hair hated oil, especially coconut oil. I recently figured out that I was doing it all wrong. 

For my last three wash days, I did a hot oil treatment on freshly washed hair, and it has made all of the difference. Oils just don't penetrate on my dirty hair. This last wash day I saw the best results ever. 

To back up, I have chronically dry hair. Retaining moisture has been my number one problem for at least the last 10 years. One of the reasons I went back to getting my hair relaxed was my natural hair was so dry it caused damaged. I've always said once I find moisture, I know my hair will thrive. Now, I'm a little more optimistic of that happening.

So after I cleaned my hair with shampoo, I applied a mix of different oils (coconut, jojoba, grapeseed, wheat germ, and a few others) that I warmed up in a bowl of hot water to my hair. I saturated my hair with it, put my hair up in a clip, and sat under the steamer for about 25 minutes. I then rinsed it out. I noticed it was hard to rinse a lot of the oil, so maybe I'll co-wash next time. I then applied my deep conditioner and let it sit with a heat cap on it for another 20 minutes. When I rinsed my hair, it felt moist and heavy in a good way. I then rollerset my hair and sat under the dryer until my hair was completely dry. When I took the rollers out, my hair felt a little oily, but it had shine and body like I haven't seen in years. I was worried that I overdid it with the oil, but wrapped my hair anyway and went to bed. When I woke up and combed my hair out, I was shocked at how moist and manageable my hair was. The feeling is what I've been looking for all of this time! There's no frizz, my hair is moist and holds a curl, and my scalp feels smooth instead of it's usual rough and dry feel. Even wrapping my hair is easier and looks better when I comb it out. 

I'm hoping this is the key to my hair health and retention. I'll be doing this hot oil treatment for my next few washes!

Stress and Dryness

My hair is finally recovering after a tough year. I had a rough breakup, took care of my sick father until he passed away, handled my dad's affairs including renovating and moving into his house, and mourned the sudden loss of my sweet dog. All of that while trying to be a good mom to my son and stay on top of my new job had me all over the place. Stress really does come out in many ways, even in the health of our hair.

I thought my hair was doing okay at first. I wasn't spending much time on it, and was wearing buns and wigs on days I couldn't deal with it. I soon realized my hair wasn't in the best shape. It was dry and lifeless, wouldn't hold a curl, and didn't absorb products. Then, I noticed lots of shedding. I wore braids all summer, but looking back, I think that was a mistake because I wasn't dealing with my hair, I was just hiding it. And, I think that made it worse. When I took my braids out at the end of the summer, my hair was armpit length, but the ends were a mess. I got a good haircut, which helped a little, but I didn't like how it felt or how it looked.

My hairstylist at the time was using a no-lye relaxer on my hair. I had only used relaxers with lye until I started going to this stylist, so I asked her to change relaxers. That made a difference, but my ends looked thin, like my hair was over processed. I made the decision to go to another stylist who could bring my hair back to health, listened to me, and had me in and out of the salon (Very important!). She has been so helpful, encouraging me to stretch my relaxers and recommending new products to try. She also gave me a great haircut, adding layers and getting rid of the see-through ends. I've been using Hot Six Oil to moisturize and my hair loves it. It keeps my hair moisturized without weighing down. I'm still working on my hair's elasticity so that it holds a curl, but I think that will come with more moisture. 

A few other things I've been doing on my own to help my hair's health:

- Applying black Adore semi-permanent color every 2 weeks. I prefer my hair color more brown, but the black makes it look so shiny and thick! And, I feel like it conditions it so that it accepts products better.
- Prenatal vitamins. My hair really thrived when I was taking prenatal vitamins when I was trying to get pregnant and after I had my son. I had to find the right one for me because I have tried others (including Biotin and Hair, Skin and Nails vitamins) that did nothing. I'm liking the Nature Made brand.
- Wrapping my hair every night. I thought my hair didn't look good after a wrap. Now that it's healthier, wrapping seems like the best thing to keep my hair smooth and looking full and bouncy. I change the direction of my wrap every few nights.
- Gave up using all oils except the Hot Six Oil. I've tried almost every natural oil, but they either sit on my hair, or weigh it down. I'm saving my oils for my skin.
- Took a break from protein. I don't think my hair needs the protein I thought it did. I haven't used a protein conditioner in a couple of months and my hair seems to be doing better.

This past year has reminded me that life, our bodies and our hair change...that's okay, we just have to be ready to deal with that change and pivot when we need to!

First Braid Out in Years!

As my hair gets longer, the less time I want to spend on it. I do a lot of exercising, and I just want to be easy and free this summer. Since I went back to relaxed hair, I have been washing, conditioning and roller setting my hair weekly. Because I'm pretty active, the curls only last a couple of days. I'm looking for easy styles this summer that will keep my hair healthy. I decided to try a braid out on my relaxed hair. I hadn't done a braid out in years!

I shampooed with Cream of Nature Argan Oil from Morocco Moisture & Shine Shampoo, deep conditioned with Shea Moisture Manuka Honey & Mafura Oil Intensive Hydration Treatment Masque and used Curls Cashmere & Caviar Hair Silk as my leave in. I don't use any of these products on a regular basis, but I wanted as much moisture as possible. I already had them at home, so I gave them a try. I really liked the Curls Cashmere & Caviar leave in- I noticed immediately how much it moisturized my hair. I let my hair air dry loose with a satin scarf around my edges. When my hair was almost completly dry, I created 8 braids using Curls Twist n Shout Cream and avocado oil. I rolled the ends with small perm rods and went to bed.

I was a little nervous to see the result the next morning. I worked out with a scarf around my edges, took a shower, and then took my braids out. I was pleasantly surprised with the results! My hair had great definition, felt moisturized, and looked really full.

This might have not been the best day for me to rock a braid out, because it was SO humid and a little rainy! On top of the humidity, I took a pretty intense yoga class and taught a yoga class. By the end of the day, I had some straight strands. My plan was to put my hair up in 2 pineapples for the night, but because of the humidity, I re-braided my hair.

If I can keep a nice braid out for 4-5 days, I think this will be a good summer style for me!

Please give me any tips on how to master my braid out!

I Was So Wrong About My Porosity!

I know, it's been forever.  Since my last post, my hair has gone through so much, including going back to the relaxer!  More about that later...in this post, I have to discuss how misdiagnosing the state of our hair can result in damage, setbacks, and making bad decisions.

Shortly after I started my healthy hair journey, I diagnosed my hair as low porosity.  For years, I've been doing techniques and using products for low porosity hair.  Most things didn't work, but I kept at it, because I thought it was the right thing to do.  Sometimes, when things worked for me, I stopped doing it because I didn't think it was good for my low porosity hair.

The strand test is the primary reason I thought I had low porosity hair.  My hair floats sometimes, but other times it sinks.  This is a reminder that one test doesn't always determine the answer!  My hair is also dry a lot, but I thought it was blocking moisture out, not letting it slip  through my hair open cuticles.

Lately it's been a challenge managing my hair.  It's been dry, breaking, and hard to keep a style.  A few days ago, I was racking my brain, thinking about what I did when I had healthy hair:

* I deep conditioned consistently
* I used protein often
* I used semi-permanent color (which I've been doing, without stellar results)
* I used Roux Porosity Control once or twice a month

Me talking to myself: Roux Porosity Control- that's what I had been missing! But isn't that for high porosity hair?  But I'm low porosity- why did it work for me?  Let me just buy some and see what happens...

A couple of days later, I bought some and applied it after I rinsed out my deep conditioner.  I left it in about 5 minutes and rinsed.  When it was dry, I had a different head of hair.  Smooth, soft, shiny, manageable. Retains moisture. Holds curls.

Finally, I breakthrough!  I went back and researched hair porosity. Duh, I have almost every symptom of high porosity hair:

• Accepts product, and then is dry shortly after
• Feels dry and coarse
• Absorbs product quickly and then loses moisture fast
• Lacks luster and shine (unless I applied a black rinse, which I don't do anymore)

High porosity hair holds up to 45% of its weight in water. When magnified, hair will have raised or broken cuticles, or part of the cuticles will have been completely removed. This hair type does not hold onto moisture as well and therefore may need some help, even if it is taking in a lot of liquid.

This also leaves the inner cortex exposed and the hair vulnerable, which can lead to damage and split ends. This is usually caused by chemical processes, heat styling, and the elements (salt water, cold dry hair, etc.).

This makes so much sense for me, because I've been relaxed most of my life, and have used color.  Also, I've been saying for years that I need a product that will absorb into my hair and give it some weight.  It's like my hair was always so light and didn't clump well.

Every time I did something for high porosity hair, I thought it was just a fluke.  It's really crazy how all this time, I could have been giving my hair what it needs, but I was doing the opposite.  This is why my mis-diagnosis hurt me and my hair:

* I was using the wrong products and techniques.
* My hair was frizzy and hard to manage
* My hair suffered breakage
* I started to hate my hair
* I went back to a relaxer

Now I know what I have to do for my high porosity hair:

• Deep condition often
• Use protein regularly
• Use heavier products
• Seal moisturizer with oil
• Try not to use any direct heat
• Use gentle, moisturizing shampoo
• Anti-humectants
• Coconut oil, aloe vera and apple cider vinegar are my friends (the jury is still out on this one)
• Roller set and pin curl often- high porosity hair does better when "clumped" together

I'm still kicking myself, because I could have a totally different head of hair right now. But, know I know...and knowing in this case is more than half the battle. Maybe I'll think about transitioning to natural again. I just want to get my hair to a healthy state where I feel optimistic about making that change again.  It was tough for me.

The moral to this story is, LISTEN TO YOUR HAIR.  Regardless of your porosity, texture, color, etc., we all have different heads of hair that react differently to products and techniques.

Product Review: Shea Moisture Yucca & Aloe Baobab Thickening Moisture Mist

I bought this product a few months ago, during a Shea Moisture buy one, get one free sale at CVS.  I had never used mists before, so I didn't know what I was going to do with it, but the fact that it is for fine, thin hair attracted me to the product.

Product Description
SheaMoisture's Yucca & Baobab Thickening Moisture Mist for fine, thin hair helps thicken strands and increase volume for thicker, full-bodied hair. - Made with natural and certified organic ingredients. - Baobab Oil contains Vitamins A, C, D, E and F to fortify and strengthen hair. - Yucca thickens hair while adding volume. - Biotin is a powerful B vitamin that strengthens the hair follicle.

Ingredients
Deionized Water, Adansonia Digitata (Baobab) Extract, Yucca Filamentosa Extract, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Oil*, Aloe Vera Leaf Juice, SD 40 Alcohol, Hydrolyzed Wheat protein, Biotin, Rosemary Extract, Bamboo Extract, Lonicera Caprifolium (Honeysuckle) Flower (and) Lonicera Japonica (Japanese Honeysuckle) Flower Extract

Directions
Spray on damp or towel dried hair, concentrating on roots. Style as desired.

My Experience
I started using this after taking my crochet braids out.  I was experiencing some shedding and breakage.  I use it almost every day on dry hair for my LOC method in the evening.  The mist is the "L" (liquid) in the method before I twist my hair.  It has a distinctive scent, not too strong though, and has the texture and consistency of water.  It's not sticky or oily at all.  I spray 2-3 squirts on each section.

This has become one of my staple products. I love this stuff.  It helped cut down on the breakage (along with a good trim), and my hair stays moisturized and soft and shiny. It makes my hair look so full and big...and I love big hair!  My hair isn't thin, but my strands are fine, and I think this product helps plump up my strands some.  It also keeps my hair more manageable.  I don't really de-tangle at all anymore when I re-twist, not even with my fingers.  All of this has definitely helped me retain growth.  Please note that there is alcohol in this mist, but I haven't noticed any ill effects from it.  I'm actually almost out, and it usually takes me a while to finish a product.  I will definitely re-purchase.

Changing My Way of Thinking

I've been natural a little over two years, and just in the past couple of months have I really come to love my hair exactly as it is.  It's been hard for me not having the hair I imagined I would or should have.  It's also been hard not comparing my hair with all of the beautiful heads of natural hair I see.

I was flipping through the October issue of Hype Hair magazine, and there was an interview with Nicole Ari Parker.  When she was relaxed and more importantly, since she went natural, she's been one of my hair inspirations.  She said something in this interview that really connected with me:

I did the big chop and I did go through a personal phase where I had to adjust to not having long hair, and reevaluate my version of beautiful or sexy.  Our hair is so emotionally connected to us. We’re used to being bombarded with images about what’s beautiful.  I had to remind myself and reclaim my beauty and let my hair grow out of my head the way it wanted to.  It really gave me myself back, and guess what? 

The minute I stopped perming, the edges came back, the breakage stopped, my hair is thick and long, I can straighten in with a flat iron now, and if I want to have a longer style, I’ll add some extensions in the back.  

I also have a daughter and I wanted her to love her hair.  I wanted her to enjoy the thickness, the bigness, the lushness of her hair and I wanted her to enjoy the versatility.  Sometimes she wants to wear cornrows, sometimes she wants to let it air-dry.  And we wanted to raise a little girl who loves jumping in the pool! [Laughs] We were always taught to be afraid of water [getting our hair wet].  So it’s been a spiritual and a personal journey.

I also went through a long period of time where I had to re-define my idea of beautiful. I'll be honest- right before I went natural, I didn't care for a lot of the natural styles I saw out there.  I made a conscious choice not to follow as many relaxed hair blogs anymore and follow more natural blogs. I created a natural hair pinterest board. And, I worked hard to appreciate my hair and other women's hair how it naturally grew from our heads.

I don't have a daughter, but I have a step daughter, goddaughters, and girl cousins and friends who probably look up to me and look at me as one example of a beautiful black woman. I want to show all of them that you can have thick, kinky hair and be beautiful.  Even now, I still feel a certain way when I walk into an event with women who are all relaxed or have weave down their backs.  But then I remember how unique I look, and how much healthier my hair is.

I also love swimming!  Although my natural hair doesn't do exactly what I want it to do when it gets wet, I force myself to get my hair wet when I'm at the beach and enjoy my time in the water.  I just bring a scarf or something to cover it after I swim if I need to!

These past two years have taught me a lot.  Even on my bad hair days- or days I think are bad hair days - I carry myself like there's nothing wrong.  I put on some red lipstick, cute earrings and a smile, and keep it moving.  And you know what?  Those are the days I get the most compliments on how pretty I look!

Haircut & Wash N Go by Jaded Tresses

A few weeks ago, I signed up for a natural hair workshop through my local natural hair meetup group.  The event was this past Saturday, and I was sick with a head cold. I felt so tired and sick and didn't want to go, but as I was laying in bed, I looked up the presenters online, and I saw that one of the presenters was a natural hair stylist from New Jersey/Brooklyn and she was giving a wash n go workshop. I was skeptical about doing a wash n go on this head, but being that she was from out of state, I wanted to see what she had to say.  I've been thinking about going to NYC to get a professional cut and style, so I thought this would help me decide for sure.  Plus, I had already paid for the workshop!! So I got my sick butt up and went to the event at a restaurant about twenty minutes from my home.

The first half of the workshop was a mixing demo with Candace Kelley of Curl Prep.  She showed us how to make a shea butter (I need to get some REAL shea butter!) and a protein conditioner.  Then, the famous Tameeka aka Jaded Tresses aka the "Curl Whisperer" talked about how anyone can do a wash n go. I was still skeptical, but she took a woman from the audience with 4c hair and did it! She showed us exactly what she did and what products she used. She did the wash n go on very wet hair and used the Sweet Buttah she and Candace promote, and an EcoStyler mix (ecostyler, water, & oil). Then she ran the product through the hair. I still wasn't sure it would work on me, though.

Tameeka was also taking appointments the next day at a local salon, so I book an appointment to get a much needed trim.  She washed and conditioned my hair, and then cut my hair while it was wet.  The then re-wet it and shingled my hair for a wash and go.  I saw my hair curl and clump like never before!  Of course it shrunk a lot as it dried, but at least I had curls.  She told me that I don't have the chronic dry hair I thought I have.  She actually told me that I have a nice head of dense, thick hair.  I really enjoyed Tameeka doing my hair. This was my first time as a natural going to the salon (not including the times I got my hair straightened), and it was a great experience. I was treated with respect, Tameeka took me in a timely manner, she gave me a great scalp massage, and we had a fun and interesting conversation- about hair and other things!  She said she might come back to Boston in November, so I might see her again for some color.

That first night I just put a bonnet on and went to bed. In the morning, I rubbed some of the Sweet Buttah on my hands, fluffed, and went out the door. The next night, I put my hair in about 8 ponytails just to stretch it some, and I still had a cute, curly afro! Tameeka said that I'd probably want to do a twistout by day 4 or 5, but that's cool- at least I don't have to twist every night. My hair finally has shape, I don't have to spend 20-30 minutes a night on it, and it looks cute!

This was my hair on day 3:

And then on day 4 after twisting it the night before using just the Sweet Buttah:

I actually like the wash and go look, so the next time I wash it, I'm going to try and go 4-5 days with the wash n go.  I feel like my experience was just the blessing I needed. I was actually thinking about doing the big chop again and just starting over.  I was frustrated with twisting it every night, not having a shape, and thinking that my hair was dry and unhealthy.  Hallelujah!!